I hate how sucked into my phone I’ve gotten, even more so as an artistic person. I can feel how constantly filling my head as to not let any thought process because it’s easier to not think and just swipe on my phone. Though there are times when my phone shows me a post that does inspire me, I notice a lack of my own creativity coming out of me, that I can’t think of any idea that I want to create with a sense of originality and my self in it.
It’s all just bizarre being old enough to remember a time where I didn’t have the same techno-luxury I have now, yet also remembering clearly when the shift of playing outside to wanting to sit in front of a computer happened. I used to have so many ideas, albiet not good ones, but at least I felt the urge to create and do things but now I struggle so much to make something and decide on what I want it to be.
Even outside of art I can feel my brain essentially rotting. My grammar has become so terrible lately, my reading skills feel are weak now, sometimes I’ll struggle to form my own independent thoughts when needing to write about something. But I do know I am trying to heal this problem in my mind. I don’t rely on machines to create my thoughts or art for me, I at least pick up a pencil and try to draw or think out whatever is rattling in my head, and I am proud of that. It feels good to know that I am creating, that it’s me choosing what lines to draw, it’s me making those spelling errors responses, it’s me actually creating and trying to do something because I care about it.
I can never understand signing up for a class, or trying to learn a creative skill, and resorting to machine to do all of the labor for you. It takes the joy out of creating, because even if it’s bad, you can continue to work on it to make it better. Creation and thoughts shouldn’t be instantanious, it should take time and intention, y’know? It all just makes me think about how insecure I can get about showing my art, thinking it’s not good enough. But now I realize not only is art subjective, but my art is almost two decades worth of practice, trying, and learning.
I feel this post isn’t too cohesive but the overarching theme is there, that being sucked into your phone and technology that does your thinking for you, that hands out quick hits of dopamine, only hinders the creativity that is latent inside. It is so important for actual humans to create and connect with each other, whether or not that creation is ‘good’ or ‘bad’, because that’s all so subjective. To limit yourself because your ego can’t handle the thought of criticism that has yet to exist against you is crazy, and something I am constantly unlearning. I hope, and already feel like, this class is allowing me to indulge more in my creativity as I design this website further.
Leave a Reply